Dave Ramsey Says Children Have No Moral Or Ethical Obligation To Care For Their Parents. They Are ‘Not Your Household’
During a recent episode of “The Ramsey Show,” a listener named Dennis from Florida challenged personal finance expert Dave Ramsey on a controversial statement he made about adult children supporting their parents financially.
Ramsey had previously said that children are not morally or ethically obligated to take care of their parents, and Dennis questioned how that aligns with the Bible’s 1 Timothy 5:8, which says, “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
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‘Your Own Household’ Doesn’t Mean Your Parents
“A question that is not a question, but that is actually a statement, is called passive-aggressive, but I’ll answer it anyway,” Ramsey said at the beginning of his response. “You’re trying to teach me the Bible. I appreciate that.”
“It says your own household and your relatives,” Ramsey continued. “Your own household is not your parents. Your household is the children that live under your roof and your spouse. That’s your household. Your parents are not your household.”
He emphasized that while helping struggling relatives is an act of compassion, it’s not a blanket requirement. “We would never suggest that you not provide for your relatives’ food or some basic care as long as there is reasonable behavior involved,” he said.
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Ramsey pointed out that the same writer of 1 Timothy, the Apostle Paul, also wrote, “Those that don’t work shouldn’t eat.” He added, “Scripture is full of cause and effect. If you sow sparingly, you will reap sparingly.”
He explained that financial hardship resulting from poor choices doesn’t automatically create an obligation for children to fix it. “There is no moral or ethical obligation for Rachel and Winston to take care of Dave and Sharon,” he said, referring to his daughter and her husband. “Nor will there be a mathematical need.”
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Co-host Rachel Cruze added that while helping a parent in genuine need can be a beautiful act of love, it’s not realistic for many families. “Forty percent of Americans can’t even cover a $400 emergency in cash. So the real truth is most people can’t even take care of their own household, let alone someone else’s.”
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Ramsey clarified that he has never told a listener not to help a parent in need. “That is an act of compassion, an act of love and I would do that myself in that situation,” he said. But, he warned, enabling irresponsible behavior is not generosity. “If you live your life on the basis of the way this guy is interpreting this scripture, it means you don’t have to plan for the future because your kids will take care of you because the Bible demands it. And that is false.”
He shared a recent caller story where a woman wanted to borrow $10,000 to buy her 80-year-old mother a new kitchen. Ramsey said, “No, you can’t do that. ‘Well, you’re not compassionate.’ Yes, I am compassionate. We have to figure out some other way.”
In closing, Ramsey explained that the Bible doesn’t call for you to support parents in the middle of their stupidity. But it does call for us to be kind in the process, to be gentle, and to be generous people, when you can.
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